Below is a very wide ricefield, looks never-ending. Ahead of me is a wall of gigantic trees like those in the movies. I almost hit its top but I made it to the other side. And then again another ricefield, but I can already sense home from a distance.
I’m sure you’ve been into a dream like that and you know how it feels like, scary and fun. But I don’t know if yours is like mine. When I first had it, though I can’t remember anymore when exactly it happened, I flew freely and effortless, like I just did it naturally. Like I was really doing it from the beginning of my existence. I’d aim high and rocket down, like making my own fear and having fun conquering it. I’d do risks intentionally because I knew I am able to handle them, and conquer them.
After that I had several of those flying sessions where I had trouble taking off. I bounced back and forth the ground, like a balloon that has lost its might. I was meant to do that but I lost my ability. It was very frustrating. I never gave up and continued trying, for several nights I felt like I’ve lost myself.
I was very unsure if I can do it ever again, until last night when I flew again. It wasn’t easy, I gave it a lot of effort to fly. I was flying low and boundless in the middle of a wide ricefield. Up ahead stood a very high wall of trees, with huge trunks and less branches and leaves. Each tree stood very close to each other, like they share the same roots. No way one can go through in between trunks, I thought it would be like hitting a real concrete wall if I would try, so I dared not to. I was at ‘cruise’ speed and getting really close to the trees very fast when I decided to go up, fly pass above it is the way to go. I’ve already given so much to be able to maintain that level and speed, and now I even have to go higher to continue the journey, or I’d hit the wall hard and fall to my ending. I reached the edge! I hit it a bit but it didn’t stop me. The branches at the edge are no match against my power, they looked helpless as I hit and broke them. It was smooth conquering them.
After the wall of trees spread widely another ricefield, as wide as the other one I just left behind, but ahead I don’t see anymore walls. It took a while before I reached that point where I needed to land. From home, that point is where you enter the ricefield, to see and feel its wilderness. It is like a gate to warp to another zone. Now I’m entering it for that purpose.
Whatta sequel of flying dreams. I don’t know if it ended last night or there will be more. I believe that these dreams carry a message for me, and that they reflect my actual and conscious life, so I asked the internet.
I realized that all these are related to the plans I had in mind, and the acts I did in the past, but I am only able to realize everything when I decided to go ahead and pursue these plans. I kept them within for a while because I wasn’t sure. I was afraid of the consequences, because it is aimed directly to the innermost core of myself. It is definitely going to break me if I fail, or bring to me my dream kind of life if I win. It is a chance-of-a-lifetime decision to make. But I have decided not just to proceed with the plans, but to win them too. (“;)